How to Help Your Kids Clean Up (Without Losing Your Mind)
Raising Orderly Kids the Montessori Way
"The little child's need for order is one of the most powerful incentives to dominate his early life."
—Maria Montessori
Dear Precious Parents,
The Familiar Chaos
You’ve been there. Your little ones are happily playing while you stir-fry veggies, and all seems well—until you peek into the family room. Boom. It’s a war zone.
Matchbox cars under the sofa. Play-Doh stuck to your pottery. Barbie submerged in your succulent pot. Mr. Potato Head’s parts bobbing in a cup of orange juice.
As you scramble to clean up before your in-laws arrive, you ask yourself: Why does my house look like a tornado passed through, while Montessori classrooms stay so tidy?
Children in those classrooms return materials calmly, no threats or bribery needed. The secret? A culture of order, introduced early and practiced daily.
Here’s how to build that same calm and care at home.
1. Recognize Their Natural Sense of Order
Even toddlers crave order. They notice when something’s out of place—and it matters to them. Once, I tilted my daughter’s hat playfully. She burst into tears and kept trying to fix it. Children want the world to make sense. Your home can support that.
2. Start Early (But Know It’s Never Too Late)
Toddlers often love tidying—especially if it feels like a game. Start while they’re young and eager. But if you’re past that stage, don’t worry. Older children still respond well to gentle structure. Start with small rituals, side by side, and slowly let them take over.
3. Tie Clean-Up to Completion
In Montessori, children aren’t allowed to begin something new until they’ve tidied up the last activity. Try this at home:
All cars go back in the box before Play-Doh comes out
Reading time ends with books returned to the shelf
Baking includes wiping counters, not just licking spoons
It’s not punishment. It’s completion.
4. Make Storage Your Secret Weapon
Storage is your silent ally. Use baskets, bins, and furniture with hidden drawers. When every item has a home, clean-up becomes simple and (almost) effortless.
5. Let Music Be the Signal
Music shifts the mood. Create a clean-up song or choose a favorite playlist. When my toddlers heard, “I love picking up…”, they’d sing along and join me. Older kids? Let them DJ their own tidy-up jams.
6. Model What You Want to See
Children imitate more than they obey. If you tidy after meals, they will too. If you keep your own desk in order, they’ll notice. Be the calm center they can follow.
7. Adjust Your Expectations
Progress over perfection. Your home won’t always look like a magazine. Keep a “dump basket” in every room for fast resets. When messes get overwhelming, gather everything in a bin and sort later. Visual chaos often leads to emotional chaos—minimize both.
8. Encourage Without Pressure
Make tidying up feel good—not like a punishment. For young ones, turn it into a game. For older kids, try checklists, personal goals, or team plans. Involve them in the process. Respect breeds responsibility.
9. Create an Invitation to Peace
"An environment that is attractive and in order is an invitation to activity."
—Maria Montessori
A tidy home isn’t sterile—it’s intentional. Beautiful, organized spaces inspire children to care, explore, and return things mindfully. When everything has a place, children feel capable, grounded, and calm.
In Essence
You don’t need bribes or threats to help your child clean up. You need rhythm, empathy, and a little Montessori magic.
✨ Start with a song.
✨ Use baskets wisely.
✨ Keep expectations realistic.
✨ And above all, trust your child to grow into this practice.
Because every act of tidying is more than just putting away toys—it’s an act of belonging, care, and respect. And that’s the kind of order that lasts far beyond childhood.
Warmly,
Susie Antonia
Susie Antonia, is the author of The Montessori Advantage. She is an educator with rich experiences from Canada, England, and the Philippines, who believes children are our future heroes. With decades steeped in the Montessori teaching method, she offers a wealth of practical parenting tips and heartwarming stories from the classroom.
Whether you're a parent navigating the maze of modern upbringing or an educator seeking a kindred spirit, you've found your tribe. Join Susie for an enriching experience that's as educational as it is inspiring.